Episode Transcript
[00:00:11] Speaker A: Let's talk. Let's an original podcast from the Lettings Hub. Hello and welcome to the latest episode of our podcast. Let's Talk. Let's. I'm Heidi. I'm the CEO of the Lettings Hub, the tenant referencing business that got good at tech. And let's Talk. Let's as most of you should know, now is our regular roundup of news and views on a whole range of subjects spanning the private rented sector. In our session today, I'm absolutely delighted to be joined by Danara Henry Dark, if I said that right. Yes, yes.
Who is the Director of Partnerships at the Property Franchise Group. Zenara started her career in property as a sales negotiator and has spent five years at Simply Conveyancing where she was highly commended as Business Development champion at the British Conveyancing Awards. Something we may get into when we discuss strategic focus, goal setting and a big drive for personal and professional growth later in this podcast. So big. Welcome to you, Zinara. Please introduce yourself to our listeners.
[00:01:10] Speaker B: Hello everyone. I think that was a great welcome in. Thank you so much, Heidi. I would also like to add that I really thought I was going to win that the Business Business Champion of the Year. So much so that I actually asked people to make a path for me to make sure that I can go on stage.
And yeah, and I got highly commended, which is like second place, but, you know, swings around about swings and roundabouts. I did get nominated the Rising Star Award and I didn't win that either. So, yeah, it's fine. I'm not sore about it. You can definitely tell.
[00:01:44] Speaker A: I was going to say it's clearly not a thing.
You're over it. You're over it as much as it started. Now, this podcast is going to be a little bit different to some of the normal things, I guess, that we talk about that are really specific related to the property rental sector. That's because recently, Zenara, you and I were discussing the topic of manifestation and most specifically a book by Roxy Nafousi called Manifest. And it's a small orange book, which I know we're not recording video here, but I have it here.
[00:02:19] Speaker B: Small orange book, that's gooden.
[00:02:22] Speaker A: It looks good on the coffee table. It's one of those types of books as well, which I think is fair to say is a concept that you have fully embraced. And I was pretty much hooked when I kind of took time to read it. So for our listeners who haven't read the book, please give us kind of an overview of what it is about and the theory.
[00:02:45] Speaker B: So the idea behind the book, one I would say, and this isn't for everyone, but one I would say is the fact of it's actually a really small book. So in terms of when you're thinking about, you know, having a read, I would say that it's a book because the size of it, that it's straight to the point, there's not too much kind of a long story behind it. And then therefore, for me, it's a background of a woman who changed her life, I would say, from a positive outlook, using manifestation. And she then talks about the seven steps of how then you implement that into your life and you will find that your life will get better. Really simple in that sense. And therefore she talks in steps of. With each step, why to do those things and how to do it. So I would class this book as a bit kind of a guide of how would I. How would I start Manifestation, how would I get there? And that to me is something that I would say is a really easy read and a logical read as well, versus kind of being like crystals and that vibe.
[00:03:49] Speaker A: So we'll come on to that bit later. So it's about 150 pages long, the book, and it's a small book, so you can definitely kind of absorb it pretty quickly. If you listen to it on Audible or an audio book, it's just over four hours long. So it's definitely a few car journeys here and there. And it's, it's kind of done and dusted.
But how did you first get into it, Zinara? How was it introduced to you?
[00:04:12] Speaker B: I would say that the first time it was introduced to me, I would say, like this part, which is Law of Attraction manifestation, Law of attraction was actually through Vicki Quinn Campbell. And me and Vicki were talking about certain things in our life and it was just before the lockdown period. And she said, you've got to. You've got to listen to this podcast called Francesca Amber. Manifestation changed my life and it's going to change yours too. That's what the podcast is called. And I thought, yep, no trouble. And like with everyone, I'm sure you be told something, you don't listen to it, you'll go, yeah, yeah. And then you don't get around to doing it. And lockdown hit. And with everyone through lockdown, I did a lot of walks, loads of walks. And I was doing this, I was on this walk and I said to my best friend, we lived together at the time, and I said, I'm going this walk, and you want to come? And she goes, no, no, I'm good, thank you. So go on this walk. And I put in the podcast. And I'm not even joking. It was about, I don't know, five minutes into this podcast. And I thought, bloody hell, she needs to listen to this. So I literally go back home, get my best friend. We share one iPad, one ipod each, and why we didn't have two, but one in my. One of hers. And we listened to this podcast and we both went, wow, this is. This is it for us. That's exactly what we needed in terms of when everyone I would say, in the world was feeling a certain way in terms of down, not knowing what to do and stuff like this. And this is a perfect example of what manifest does is that changing our outlook on life. And that was it for us. So we listened to that. She talks about Roxy's book, and next thing you know, I'm reading the book. My cousin, I would say, for me, is also one of my best friends.
I remember saying to her, like, you need to read this book. It's so great. And she went, I read that book years ago. And I was like, well, no wonder why your life is so great. So that was my first kind of inkling into this side and how I got from the podcast to the book and how I got to talking about it to you.
[00:06:19] Speaker A: Excellent.
So let's talk about then when I first spoke to you about this, this was a few months ago now, you were really raving about it as a concept, but you told me a story very early on to the conversation that we had, which is kind of struck with. Stuck with me, I suppose. So let's kind of share that story with our listeners. Now, this is about a lady who wasn't having a great time in her life, and it really kind of turned around. And then we'll kind of talk about the seven steps, as you mentioned before, and how they all fit together.
[00:06:57] Speaker B: So the story that I. The story that I like is because, you know, in terms of. A lot of people talk about coincidence to manifestation and how that works. So this one is about Francesca Amber, who does the podcast. Manifestation changed my law of attraction, changed my life, not changed yours, too. And she basically was in a rut in the sense of love and couldn't find boyfriend after boyfriend and just losing the will to live. And this was back when plenty of fish was around and people used that dating website instead.
And she thought, right, I'm gonna go on the dating website, and I am going to be particular because a lot of people talk about manifestation and law of attraction being really, really scri. As in I want this, this is what I want and this is when I want it. So she categorized what she wanted in terms of eye color, hair color, this, this and this, what they do, blah, blah, blah, etc. And her filters or range of men that was available was like four that she had. Very similar actually to my story of how I met my partner. So I think that's quite interesting.
Really, really small. I hope he didn't turn out to be what happens at the end.
[00:08:09] Speaker A: Yeah, let's hope there's. I think there might be a happier ending.
[00:08:14] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And anyway, so really limited in terms of men that's available. And she's like, this is the man. Like, I have found my man. But when he was last active on Plenty of Fish was a long time ago. And she thought, God, you know, nothing's going to happen from that. She reaches out to him and obviously Lola hall, nothing happens. He doesn't reply, he doesn't get there. And she's like, no, this man is my man. So she prints off the picture of this man and she puts it on her mood board and left it there none the wiser. That's now gone.
A year later or two years later, her friend goes, right, I'm bored of you talking about the fact that you don't have a man in your life. I'm going to set you up on a blind date. She goes, this blind date and God, behold, there he is. This is the man that she message on plenty of fish that didn't reply to her that she printed off. And there he is, sat in front of her now, she thought, there you go. This is manifestation in a nutshell. She marries him, she has a kid with him. Turns out he's gay, he gets divorced. However, however, the main point from that is this man came into her life and changed it completely in a sense of she wouldn't have the daughter that she'd always wanted. He then pushed her from. She currently was a hairdresser in this local place in London. She was miserable. He said to her, you need to quit, you need to quit. You need to make this yourself. You could be so much better doing this yourself. And she did it. She became really successful doing it. He supported her in many ways and now is one of her. And now she calls him one of his, one of her best friends. So there's many times where you kind of look at something and go, actually, God, this is Awful and actually wasn't meant to be. But that man was always meant to be into her life, regardless of what his sexual preferences are. So the main story from that is that, to me, is manifestation in a nutshell, that she's gone. This man is, for me, there he is in front of her, and now look what he's brought into her life. So that's the story that I go, you know, hit me.
[00:10:23] Speaker A: Yeah. I always thought it would be strange if, you know, he turned up at her house and he's there on the wall, you know, when he had just met her. That would be slightly strange.
[00:10:32] Speaker B: You know what, though? I wouldn't put that past me. If someone. If someone came by my house and I went, oh, this? Yeah, yeah. These are pictures of you. Yeah, just don't worry about them. I think that's something that. If you met me, you would go, yeah, fair enough. I take that with Sanara.
[00:10:45] Speaker A: Okay, so there are seven steps in manifestation. So it's called the seven steps to living your best life.
[00:10:53] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:10:53] Speaker A: And we were talking about this before that. I think it's quite important that this isn't just about your working life. This is about your life, isn't it?
[00:11:00] Speaker B: Overall? Yeah, definitely. I think. I think all of us can agree that if you've got stuff going on in your personal life or listeners here are really glad not to be seeing me in hiding right now, because I feel like absolute death.
And therefore those things do creep into your work life. And that's why this is important, because it goes from both sides. It's personal life and work life, I think.
[00:11:27] Speaker A: Yeah. And let's kind of talk about, you know, some people would say, well, it's kind of. You mentioned before crystals and, you know, other things. It's a bit like, is it. Is it some. Is it. Is it magic or is it coincidence? Or how does it happen? Why does it happen?
[00:11:42] Speaker B: Yeah.
And don't get me wrong, I. Sometimes I'm like, well, it could be coincidence. Sometimes I think to myself, there is no way that that is a coincidence. So there's. There's odd occasions of it. And the way that my outlook on it and the way that I would hope people listen to this, think about it is, you know, why does it matter if it's a coincidence, if it's not, if it's a positive outcome to your life, great, just take it. I think the. What happens is a lot of people see it as, you know, there's also the moon and how that affects people. And then you've got Loads of other bits of where actually could. It could just be a coincidence of it. But there is real science behind it too, which I'm sure we'll talk about. So there's those parts. So if you go with the first step then Heidi, what's the first step on there?
[00:12:33] Speaker A: So just going back to what is actually said in the book. It says manifesting is a meeting of science to your point and wisdom. It's a philosophy to live by and a self development practice to help you live your very best life, which I think that kind of sums it up. So there are seven steps and you can absolutely see when you read the book how some of us probably do this in a work capacity all the time and actually without realizing it, we apply it. But actually sometimes you don't do it so much in your home life maybe. So step one is be clear in your vision.
[00:13:08] Speaker B: Yeah. And that one, to me, the one that I really like the, in my head everything has to be kind of logical in that way. And I like to be able to have an example of when I'm talking about something, an analogy. And that there is being clear is if you're getting in your car and you're going to a destination, you don't just say to your car, get me there. You get me there. You will literally put in your sat nav the postcode. You'll then look at the time that you need to be leaving to get there on time. You are literally descriptive of, I want to get to Manchester. Not just Manchester, I want to get to this particular location and I want to get there by 1:00, please. And that's the point that, the way that, that step one is really clear to me is going, what do you want? And be really clear about it.
[00:13:59] Speaker A: Yeah, the book says you need to know exactly, exactly what you want and then you really need to visualize it. And then to your point, you mentioned the mood board earlier, but people create mood boards, don't they? That's kind of what's advised in here.
[00:14:14] Speaker B: Yeah, because, you know, and Francesca Rambo talks about this a lot in terms of having a mood board and, and it could be where that you actually start to look at things and go, actually that isn't what I want. I just, I just kind of guessed that, you know, I do want to be this or do you want that? But visualization really works in terms of our brain too. And having that there and then going, yeah, I do want this. Or, you know, you want to have your bank account says five grand in something, but you want it to say ten grand. Or it could be where that you want your car to look a particular way and you print it off and you have it there.
The only thing I would say with that, and this is something that I quite, I find really interesting is I do like a list. So I will do rather than a vision board because I'm just generally more lazier when it comes to some things.
You should see my to do list in a daily basis.
I like to just have a real clear notes on my phone, what do I want? And therefore having that you leave it there and then you can look back at it, you know, in six months time, in a year time. And that would be what I would class as a vision board. But I remember having, and most people, they remember anyone that I worked with came through, came across to my desk when I worked at simply conveyancing. I had a particular car that I wanted, and I had exactly the car that I wanted and I printed it off and I had it there. I couldn't think of anything worse than having that car now. Yeah, so it's.
[00:15:43] Speaker A: So you can change your mind.
[00:15:45] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. You know, I actually don't want that car. So how mad that I was like, I printed it off, I wanted it there, and I was like, this is the car for me. But I couldn't think of anything worse than having that car now.
[00:15:57] Speaker A: Yeah. And that's kind of what the book talks about originally. It kind of talks about is doing a vision board. And it's explained by literally, you know, cutting out pictures or words or whatever it is and sticking them on a board. And then.
Yeah, and then you put it away. Yeah, you put it away for six months or a year, and then, and then you keep visualizing exactly what you want and how you can make it happen. And it talks about kind of you. You end up making it happen more because of the actions that you take and the energy that you're surrounded with and the people that you surround yourself with and the opportunities that you do. And when you then pull it out in a year's time, or you can pull it out any other time, by the way, like, to Zenara's point, you don't have to kind of lock it away. And you can't change your mind at any time. If you kind of want to add something, take it away or totally, you know, rip it apart and start again, you can.
But to your point, it doesn't have to be a board. It could be a note, it could be, you know, Like a note on your phone. It could be anything you want, couldn't it? In terms of just being able to kind of document something to say, this.
[00:17:00] Speaker B: Is what I want, it's putting the action into it. So I think it's like with anything, if you think to yourself something your brain is only able to remember and obtain a certain amount of information, whereas physically putting something down and doing the action is the idea from it is the fact of you are thinking about something, you're manifesting and then you're. You're putting the action in. They, they talk about a lot in terms of like candles or for me, this is a bit of a weird one, but mine's my washing machine. So for example, if I put a wash on and I physically put the act of washing on, I feel so much better. I feel weight has been lifted from me. And some people feel that with lighting a candle, some people find it by doing gratitude and writing the list. And some people find it, it's the action from it. So sticking it on it could be. You could take screenshots nowadays. Nowadays and you do manifestation balls on your phone. There's so many ways that you can do a vision board and I think, try it. Or the worst that can happen is you don't get what you want and you weren't going to get that anyway. So what's the worst that's going to happen?
[00:18:08] Speaker A: Yeah. And so moving on to step two, then. Step two is removing the fear and the doubt.
And that's what's talked about in the book is when you get to that stage, often once people understand this stage, they very then quickly go back and amend their vision board again.
[00:18:29] Speaker B: Limitation.
[00:18:31] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:18:31] Speaker B: Yeah.
And I think a really good one of that is when, when we start saying this now and we're saying, you know, the fear of doubt and stuff like this and going back to your vision board and amending.
I think a lot of people will think of things that they want and then when we talk about this stage, they will go, ah, I see what you mean. So a good example of that is. And you catch people doing it. I definitely. I catch people doing it all the time. Well, someone goes, oh, I never get that.
Or well, no, no, I wouldn't, I wouldn't be able to. Wouldn't be able to do that. That's a limitation. Belief like that is you limiting yourself and therefore no wonder why you would never get there in that sense. So it's about going, well, no, oh God, I've never been able to afford that car. So you don't put it on your vision board. And it's that, it's that kind of attitude of going, well, hang on, why not? Why, why can't you get there? You have no idea what's around the corner. I had no idea that I would have this role that I'm in now. That role, it wasn't a role that was in poverty franchise group and was advertised. It could be where that you thought to yourself, well, no, that would never happen to me because, you know, I only have one child and now I'm with my partner and he's got two children and I've got three children now. So there's so many things that you think to yourself, actually, I wouldn't put on a vision board because of limitation, belief. So that's the kind of idea there.
[00:19:52] Speaker A: And it says in the book, the important thing to understand about manifesting is this. You do not manifest from your conscious thoughts alone. You manifest mainly from your subconscious beliefs about what you deserve. And this means you can only manifest what you truly believe you are worthy of attracting into your life. So it talks in the book about saying, you know, if you were pitting on your vision board, you know, I want to increase my salary by £20,000. When you go, oh, that's never going to happen. I'll put 10.
[00:20:25] Speaker B: Yeah, exactly that.
[00:20:26] Speaker A: Because I think that that could be possible. Whereas what this book really encourages to do is say, well, no, put 20. And is 20 enough? Maybe 30 would be better. Like, you know, yeah, why not?
[00:20:39] Speaker B: And the same with weight loss, I think some people go, you know, I want to be skinny. And in the back of their head, most people will have that little voice that goes, you're not going to be skinny. This is silly, you're never going to get there. And it's that, it's that little voice that goes, no, no, no. And you just need to have that. Have that belief in yourself to go. Basically it put it on there.
[00:21:01] Speaker A: Yeah, why not?
[00:21:03] Speaker B: You know, why not?
[00:21:03] Speaker A: And it's just, it's a personal thing for you. So it's not like it's got to be shared or disclosed to anybody else, has it? I mean, you could obviously do that if you wanted to, but it's for you. So you don't have to justify anything.
[00:21:16] Speaker B: Yeah, that was a good one. They were saying about, in terms of you don't have to share it.
One thing that I found quite hard with kind of journals and physical boards was the fear of judgment.
And that's why I think I did it on my phone. So I think one thing I would recommend is that if you are someone that actually has that in the back of your mind and it limits you for putting it is to put it on your phone. And you can have locks on your phone in terms of. Of notes and these kind of things. Because I think that's one thing that a lot of us would. If no one knew what you were going to say, what kind of freedom you would have with that.
[00:21:55] Speaker A: Yeah. Excellent.
So once we've kind of got through step two, we move on to step three, which is align your behavior with your goals.
[00:22:04] Speaker B: Yeah. Action to words basically, is a good way to put that, and I think a good one. I always kind of talk about this one when I say about weight loss is because you don't just wake up and become skinny in your mind. And what does skinny look like to some people? Skinny to me versus skinny to someone else can be completely different. The amount of times that I've said to someone, oh, I want to lose weight, and someone goes, you look great. What are you talking about? But my version of what I want to look like versus what other people do is different mindsets. So the point by that is putting action to worse. If I never signed up to the gym or I didn't eat it, didn't eat healthy or change my action, of course I'd never lose weight the same in terms of, you know, completing a task. If I want to complete a task and I want to get it done by a deadline within work, having the goal to go, actually, it will just get there. It won't just get there.
That's a belief that sometimes people misunderstand when it comes to manifestation. I don't just become a certain way. It needs to be that you put action to words. So a good one is where a negative happens in your life and you turn it into a positive with it. There's a positive spin, and that's the action.
[00:23:17] Speaker A: Excellent. And when we were starting this podcast, and as an I mentioned earlier, she's not feeling very well, but she did say to me, oh, I am sat here with the most loveliest view because you have just recently moved into a new home. You count it as your dream home.
[00:23:34] Speaker B: Yeah. So that.
[00:23:35] Speaker A: That's kind of. I guess you've had to do some stuff and lots of things have happened over a period of time for you to land up sat there today.
[00:23:43] Speaker B: Yeah, definitely. And you know, I think the. I would class myself as someone that's a positive. Penny, you know, this. This hits the Fan. And I am thinking, at least we've got a fan. Like, it's that mindset of changing. Changing your mindset, which can be really annoying. I can imagine that too. I do feel sorry for people that are close to me where you just want to be down, but it's. It's that it's going well. Actually, I'm now really grateful for where I am today and that actually you have to put action into your words to get there. I don't just. I didn't just stumble upon this house. It. It took a lot of graft and to get there. But at the same time, I remember seeing this. This video about where people were really low and what they were grateful for and stuff like this. And there's a part of me that goes, yeah, I am grateful, but I'm also determined. So there's. That side to it is going, yeah, no, I definitely am someone that, you know, there's a session which is called lucky Girl syndrome. And Lucky Girl syndrome is basically where. And I think I've always been this person that everything will work out. Everything will work out. You don't need to. You don't need to stress. Everything will work out. And there's science behind it. You know, there's a theory done by this. I have to figure out what the guy's name is. But basically it's where the study was done. And it was like a third of people that live a more positive outlook on life are less likely to have a heart attack.
And it's that kind of mindset of going, well, actually, you know, we are down and taking that spin on it is how we get there. So, yeah, I might be feeling like absolute death, but I'm looking at a lamp that brings me so much joy because I got it half price yesterday and turns out that it was the lamp I always wanted. So there's things that you can change in terms of it. But don't get me wrong, I still feel like death. I'm just changing the way I'm looking at it.
[00:25:39] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay, so moving on to step four, then.
This is. Obviously, we've set the vision. We've kind of then amended the vision. I guess when we've kind of gone, no, no, no, we can do this and remove the fear and doubt, started doing all of the things to kind of move towards that. Step four is overcoming tests from the universe.
[00:25:58] Speaker B: So I would say that from my perspective of looking at this, it would be where that not everything is going to be positive, basically. So there is going to be Things that come into your life that you go and you start doubting it. I definitely have done it before where I go, right, for sake, like this has happened now, like I'm not joking. I would say in the last couple of weeks I've had one thing after another go wrong. This has gone wrong, this has gone wrong. I was in Texas and we were getting a rental car. We turn up, we booked it for the wrong day. There's no rental cars available in there. We now have to pay an extra thousand pounds to get an extra to get a rental. There is going to be things in life that be thrown at you that is going to test you in terms of going, this isn't for me or this ain't happening. And I think it's about always reminding yourself that, okay, what brings to me is meant to be there and if it's not meant to be, it will push me in a direction that's, that's showing me something. And it's, it's about that mindset of going, okay, there's a reason why this has happened. So I give you a good example of this one that happened to me the other day was on the weekend we were driving to Liverpool and it was where that we were doing a task that wasn't really something that we both wanted to do, but it had to be done in that sense. So it wasn't where you're going for a trip and you're going woohoo, I'm going for a trip. It was a trip going, right, I've got to do this. It's an hour drive, I've got this, no trouble, we'll get it done, come back and we're already running late and next thing you know there's a noise. The car is making this weird noise and I'm on this on the phone to my, my best friend, my cousin and we pull over and we're already stressed because we have lost the van key. And inside the van key is the spare van key obviously and pretty much most of my belongings that I need for the next day. So the stress level is high. We've gone box, that key is gone and we pulled over. We're already late. There is a puncture in the car and if we continued to drive we would probably die. So that's not good.
We then look around to then go, right, we've now missed our appointment. We don't know where the van key is. We now have to pay £200 for someone to go fix the tire.
That is the point where you go, this is. This sucks. Like, okay, the positive from it and the bit that, like, I always will then revert back to is because we were sat there in the car waiting for this person to come and fix the tire from us, we were able to kind of sit there and, you know, whatever. And there was the van key stuffed right at the back there. It was there for us to find. So we've now found the van key that we now don't need to panic about and. And get a locksmith out, which we had booked so to come that day. There's a positive there. The next one was when he. When the guy came to fix the tire to replace the tire, he looked at the right hand side tire and there was a blowout on there that we didn't know about. And therefore we would have. But that would have. That would have also happened too. So we changed those two ones and we were able to change the appointments and get there later. So these are the things that I say that, you know, it cost us money and we got there, but eventually positive things came from it.
[00:29:25] Speaker A: Yeah. And when we move on then to kind of step five. Step five is about embracing gratitude. But the important thing here that's talked about is without caveats.
[00:29:36] Speaker B: So for me, when it comes to gratitude with it, this is where I.
You can spin this on multiple ways. I think you can spin this on your personal, your work and with your family. So one I like to do with the children is just talk about what they're grateful for within their day. And it could be the simplest thing of the fact of they really enjoyed their cereal today. Great. 1. It could be one where you do your morning meeting with your team and you go about, what were you grateful for this week? What's been a highlight of your week? And that could be a personal. That could be the fact of they just had the best coffee today. And it's changing that mindset where someone goes, oh, nothing's happened to me today. My day's been crap. And you go, well, what are you grateful for? Were you grateful for that, you know, your train arrived on time? Were you grateful for the fact of there was no rain today? What kind of things were you grateful for? And it's. It's that.
And then the next one is your own self of. In terms of where. What am I grateful for today? Yeah, I feel like crap, but I'm grateful for the fact I've got a lovely view. So it's. It's that. That's what I say about being.
[00:30:47] Speaker A: I Think when I was driving home from work on Monday, I was ringing my husband because I was like, I'm just going to be a few minutes late. Make sure you're kind of back on time. And he said, oh, how was your day? And I was like, oh, yeah. And usually I'll go, yeah, fine, you know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, like. And then I was like. And I actually stopped to think about the question for a second and I was like, actually, today's been a great day. Actually, you know, there was, you know, stuff at home that had gone great, although I hadn't been there to see it. Like, you know, that was all going well, actually. You know, I was spending time with a new guy on my team. Brilliant. You know, really, you know, good afternoon.
I'd been. And done some stuff in the morning that was fun. I've been to the dentist, it was fine. Didn't cost me any money. Like, you know, you kind of go through all the things and then you kind of go. Actually, it's actually a great.
[00:31:33] Speaker B: Yeah, a lot. Yeah. And that's. And I think that's the. That's a bit too. And I think we.
I don't know if it's more like a British culture where we don't want. It seems weird if we're super happy about stuff and we have to. We have to kind of apologize for it. I think. I think one that we all do quite a lot is where we go. Yeah, it's great. Let's say this house, for example. I could go, this is a really great house. And then I suddenly feel the need to say to someone, but it's not completely finished yet. You know, it's that side. And actually, I should be completely free to go. Love this house. I'm so grateful for it.
[00:32:10] Speaker A: Yeah. And it's mine.
[00:32:11] Speaker B: And it's mine. Yeah. I mean, the bank owns a lot of it.
[00:32:15] Speaker A: Yeah, but.
[00:32:15] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, but exactly.
[00:32:19] Speaker A: We do kind of temper things down. May sometimes.
[00:32:22] Speaker B: Yes, yeah, yeah, definitely. And that. Yeah. And I think it's with anything, you know, with outfits, the way you look or, you know, it's so strange to say, you know what, I look great today. Like, why is that such a strange thing to do? And in my daughter's room, I've got. What I've got posters, for example, like, in terms of put your positive pants on and you look great. Those kind of affirmations of where you go. Actually, like, I look really good today. And it's such a strange thing that it's not okay to be like that. And it's more of a thing to be more coy about yourself and actually know I'm really good at presenting or I'm really good at building someone else up too. It's that kind of one to go. I'm grateful for the way that I am.
[00:33:11] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay, Excellent. And I do think if anyone says thank you or pays a compliment, often it's shrugged off, isn't it? Or it feels embarrassing to receive. And that's kind of what it's saying it shouldn't be. You know, you should absolutely, totally embrace that.
[00:33:24] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:33:25] Speaker A: So moving on to step six, turning envy into inspiration.
[00:33:31] Speaker B: Yeah, I love this one, you know, because I think it's one that we can all be if we're being completely honest with ourselves. Where if you, let's say, for example, you are in your overdraft or you. You didn't win that particular account and someone else won it, you do have a slight envy of it and not everyone does. I can definitely put my hands up and say that there's been occasions where I've caught myself and gone, oh, that's a bit, you know, why am I being jealous or envious of that person? And the mindset for me for that, that is. And there's a good one that they talk about is the fact of, and I've done it before, where you on social media and you see something happen to someone and rather than being envious about it, you message them and say, love that for you, or great, like, well done. Just want to reach out and just say, that's amazing for you. And definitely a shout out that I have to say is my old colleague Celso messaged me and he said, I'm just reaching out just to say how proud I am of you. And just, it's great to see that you're smashing live. It's that side, it's changing the fact of that person could turn around and say, God, so now I was doing well, wish I was doing well. Why instead it's going, love that for her. You go, smash that. It's that. It's that change of it. And recognizing in yourself that actually, are you jealous because you want it for yourself? And therefore if you want it for yourself, it should be saying, I'm really glad that that person has that. I hope that happens to me too. Very.
[00:35:08] Speaker A: Finally then, step seven is trust in the universe.
[00:35:12] Speaker B: Yeah. And when. When people say about the universe and the reason why I'm kind of a bit, kind of protective over particular words is because obviously I'VE been preaching this now for a while. And the negativity that I get is when people say, you know, things like universe, spiritual and stuff like this. Trusting universe for me is putting stuff out there and letting it be. And I think it's about changing your mindset of going. What is meant for you will. Will come to you. And your path is there for a reason. And you can believe that in a higher God, you can believe that in the universe, you can believe that in just yourself is going what will be, will be. And trusting that you're going through it. Whatever you're going through now is meant to happen for you. And having a positive outlook on it, putting words into action, you will get where you need to be.
[00:36:04] Speaker A: Now, the book ends by two kind of quotes that I kind of like both of them. So the first one is the secret of getting what you want from life is to know what you want and believe you can have it. And it's kind of as simple as that. And the second kind of the book very much ends by saying, someone once told you that you couldn't have it all, and I'm here to tell you that you can.
[00:36:24] Speaker B: There's a really good one, I don't know if anyone's seen it, where not everyone likes her, but Kim Kardashian, she talks about this and she basically said that she wanted to be on a cover of a magazine. I think it was like a dog magazine or something, just to get her face out there. And this woman turned around and said, look, you're never going to be on these faces of things. You're going to need to take up this really crappy one. And she was like, well, I'll show you. And, you know, she was on the COVID of Vogue. There's all these things and it's. It's that kind of one. There's another one which is the Wetherspoons, the guy that did. Did the pubs. There was a teacher that said to him, if he carries on the way that he is in life, he'll never amount to anything.
And there's so many scenarios in life where you will hear people that have been really successful and they've been told that they wouldn't be able to be successful. And the main thing is that. And I see all the time where people, for example, are really good, you know, account managers or whatever it might be. And I've seen someone be something and they've limited themselves, go, I can never do that. Why? Why can't you do that? Why can't you go and go and do that and it's that it's going, why can't you meet the love of your life? Or why can't you lose the weight that you want to do? Or why can't you be happy with what you've got? All these kind of things, it's saying, why not?
[00:37:43] Speaker A: Yeah. So do you think then we're just kind of coming to the end because we've been talking for so long, go through the steps. But is it for anyone or is it for certain people manifesting?
[00:37:57] Speaker B: I think if I'm being completely honest, there's people out there that are always negative. There's people out there that, you know, they could have the best things happen to them and they're still not happy or they are still, they can still turn it into a negative for it. And for those people this will never work. It doesn't matter how much you push it and go for it or, or if I'm honest, they try and I've seen it where these people are trying, they kind of fake it. And when you fake it and it won't, it won't happen for you because truly inside you're not really believing it and therefore it's not happening. And when I say believe it, it's about just having positive, positive, you know, we're all made up of atoms and having that vibration of a positive versus negative. It won't, it won't come together. People can't see my hands.
[00:38:42] Speaker A: But yeah, and you've got to be open minded and you know, just have a positive outlook on everything that you kind of come across. Even if you are going through a bad time.
[00:38:55] Speaker B: Yeah. And I think.
[00:38:56] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:38:56] Speaker B: So answer your question. Is it for everyone? I truly don't believe it is for everyone. I think it's where that there is only certain people that are open minded and there is a pattern between people that are positive and have that outlook will be more successful in life. Dead simple. And there will be people that won't be as successful in life. And when I say successful in life, I don't always mean about people that are the riches or this. Successful in life is what you find successful in life. You know, some people are so satisfied with X, Y and Z and therefore their outlook on life is they're happy with it. So it's that. So I think not for everyone, but you can definitely try. Everyone can try is my point.
[00:39:39] Speaker A: Yeah. And it is a very personal journey. So thank you, Zinara. When we post the pod, we'll put the Links to the book and the other podcast, et cetera, so people can have a good look around. And like I said, it's an audiobook as well. Before you go, our regular listeners of let's Talk let's will know we always end every podcast by asking our guests if they have a funny story or anecdote that they are willing to share.
[00:40:06] Speaker B: Okay, I'm just trying to think of one on the top of my head with it.
I think for me, I'll go with the one that we spoke about before, which is how I met my partner, because I like that one. And that is for me going, I am never going on a dating app, ever. Never go on a dating app. I go to a manifestation day in London and it's all sponsored by Bumble. And I think, right, okay. And my best friend goes, go on, you need to do this. This is the only one that the woman makes the first move. I download the app, I have lots of dates which are just horrendous that, you know, awful dates. And I think, no, this isn't for me. I need to be more particular. I need to categorize the person that I want and be, you know, and I paid the £40 premium option to do so. And even then I still was like, absolutely not. And I happened to be up north because my family lived there. For people listening, I lived, originally lived down south. And my friend at the time was never been on a dating app either. And he wanted to go through the app and he was swiping on everyone that I wouldn't want to swipe on in that sense. And I thought, right, okay, this is, this is funny, but this needs to stop. Now. I go to bed, I go to delete the. Delete the app. And before I do it, a person, it's there on my screen and only had about four people to ever swipe on because I was so particular about what I wanted and this person was there. I went through their pictures and I thought, thank you, Nancy, here we go. And I messaged them and next thing you know, their love of my life. So I think these kind of things are where you don't know what's going to happen. And my story is one that I go, you know, this is great that's happened to me. So the reason why at the beginning, when I was telling the story about Francesca, Amber meeting her lover, life, obviously hers turned out to be gay. I just hope that my partner doesn't.
[00:42:09] Speaker A: Turn out to be gay. And I guess it's like, you know, it's exactly like kind of all the positive points and going through the steps is that was at a point where you and Erin have given up with it and actually go, boom, there you go.
[00:42:21] Speaker B: I think that's, that's always the one. If you're at rock bottom, you know, it can't get any worse, so it can only get better. And it's that mindset of everything will happen for you. And I just hope people listening will take on with the fact of going, why don't I just try? If something bad happens to you or you feel a bit negative, is thinking to yourself, you know what this is meant to be for me, or changing that little bit of a mindset and just doing that one little thing. And if you do have time to listen to Francesca Amber's podcast or listen to the audio for Roxy Nafusi's one, then I do believe that your life will change from it.
[00:42:59] Speaker A: Excellent. And what a brilliant way to end. So to ensure you never miss an episode of let's Talk, let's please follow us on Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcast. Please leave us a review. Thank you so much, Tanara, and thank you all for listening. Let's Talk, let's an original podcast from the Lettings Hub.
